Lord, here I am. Another notebook filling up. Calendar pages turned. I am coming here, I am going outside, I am trying to be faithful.
You are being faithful in that you keep coming to your Source, Who is Me, the Great I AM. But you so quickly unplug and move into your daily. I so want you to stay connected, stay aware of your connection, and you still don’t know quite how to do that yet. What you see is your weariness, and what I see is your tenacity–and your beauty. How you come, over and over. How you choose to bless, how you want others blessed. How you pray. How you struggle for others and take on their concerns and their causes. In so many ways, you are still waiting for the full flowering of your own creative life. Every time you sense there is more, you vacillate–between thinking I Am trying to hurry you along, or thinking you must hurry yourself, or thinking you need to hold back. There is no hurry. I mean for you to enjoy the journey.
Right now you feel in another creative slump. The cure for a creative drought is daring. Daring to believe, daring to climb, daring to put new work out there. Your strategy is to diminish and withdraw, but My Call is to expand and grow and share. Over and over I have called you to name your heart’s desires, and over and over you keep them bottled and locked, hidden away from your own knowing. You are burying yourself alive when you do that. Your creativity goes into hibernation in self-defense.
I Am here to awaken you again, but I want for you to hear Me: Write out your Vision Quest. Write down your heart’s desires, all of them. Be honest with yourself and with Me. Make vision boards. I cannot bless what you will not let awaken. Look how Pete has supported you as Photographer. You think he will not support you also as Writer? Put it all out there. The first time you really did this, really let yourself dream, was 1993, and the west, and Pete himself, are all part of the flowering of that time. The last time you really did this, really let yourself dream, was 2003, and your life now, as owner of Yellowhouse and SeaDragon, as a wildlife and nature photographer, is a direct outflowing of that time. It is time to let yourself dream again, in the now. As then, so now. Dream. Be real on the page. Don’t hold back. Start envisioning. Trust Me to help you open the eyes of your own heart. I see already, and what I see is glorious, is magnificent. As I told you so long ago, don’t be afraid of it, just be faithful to do what I tell you every day.
Ok, Lord. I am hearing Yoda–do or not do; there is no try. I have “not-do.” I need to do this. You keep asking, You have been asking, so You must have a reason. I need to trust You for what the exercise reveals. I feel a small flicker of joy, of hope. God, I can’t go here alone. And I hear back…
You are not alone. You are never alone–you’re with Me.
Thank You Lord. I hear You. You, Who are Timeless, whose Word is Timeless. I hear You.