Category: Relationship

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Summer’s Southern Gifts

Lord, You have talked to me about the North, and then about the West. Are we going to talk about the South now?

Yes, now it is time to move South on the wheel. What does South mean to you?

Lord, South means connection. The heart–my heart. What I love. Affection. What I am passionate about.

The South can become a place of zeal centered in the intellect, which is its danger for you. You’ve lived in that place before, mistaking effort for genuine enthusiasm, and you are there again. Other than these few minutes in the morning, you are parched for the water you find in the south. You are withering because you are not watering your closest relationships, other than your relationship to Me. But as I have told you, you humans are meant to connect with others, soul-connect, not just intellect-connect. You need to take some time and examine your heart’s garden. The state of your front yard is a perfect metaphor. What is going on in your garden?

Well, Lord, of course it is winter here literally, not summer. But last summer for the first time we hired professional yard help. And our well is broken, or dry. It doesn’t pump the water that flowers need to grow and thrive. And our drainfield failed, so when the guys came to replace it, they dug up the whole front yard, made a real mess digging up all the old pipe, and cutting out part of the sidewalk, but then they put in a brand new drainfield and leveled all the dirt. So now the septic system works, but all we have for a front yard is level dirt–which is going to turn into a mud field as soon as it rains.

You could use some excavation as well. The thought that you have to handle as much as you can by yourself is not helping you now, it is poisoning you. You fear to connect because you think your current vulnerability or need will turn your friends off, so you withdraw, thinking, I will get in touch when I have more to Give. Give them the Gift of Giving to you. The South is the place of giving and receiving, and in this cycle of summer in your journeys around the wheel, it is your season to receive. You can still grow a beautiful and abundant crop, but only if you avail yourself of all the love and support just waiting for you to reach out.

Gosh, God, it’s that important, huh?

Crucial, it is crucial. But as with everything else, it is up to you. So will you embrace this season of summer in your life? Are you willing to admit to your need and receive help? Not just task help, life-help. Heart-help. Water, soul-quenching streams. Can you say yes to receiving?

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Dreaming Awake

I would like to ask for better dreams. Relaxing nighttime scenarios would go a long way to waking refreshed, I would think. I feel like I’m thrown into these movie plots, all of which are exhausting either emotionally or physically or both. I don’t know how to shift the landscape of my dreaming.

What sort of landscape would you like?

Oh well, I am picturing a field, a kind of open field–and there’s a little streamlet, sort of like the stream in Montana–and Aslan is suddenly there, Your Golden Lion Self.

And what am I-As-Aslan saying and doing, in this dreamscape of yours?

Well, You are looking at me, our eyes are meeting, and I am not afraid. There is obviously Power here but great Love. I feel as if You are telling me Something Important, giving me an assignment or task. There’s a tree, I am under a tree. Like one of the apple trees of my childhood, that shape.

How fitting that Aslan should meet Eve under an apple tree!

Oh! But You aren’t scolding; You are saying, I make all things new.

Yes, I Am calling you, calling all humanity, to renewal, not as a church movement, as a lifestyle in Me. What was the fruit for, in Narnia?

It was for healing, for Digory’s mother.

The fruit you have asked for, the fruit of renewal and reconciliation, heals so much of your world’s ills.

God, I’m sorry–Kaylee barked, the propane gas guy is here filling our tank, I’ve lost what You were saying.

I’m saying take and eat. I’m saying what I said to Digory–take this with you, feed those around you. The fruit you share reaches beyond these words; it’s your life, your loving life.

Lord, I get impatient, I get distracted, I get discouraged…

Shhh, shhh. Here is what I see. You catch yourself in those moments, over and over. You don’t let them overtake or overwhelm you. Now what do you see in your imaginary field?

Animals, all sorts of critters, trotting and running up to me. I’m being mobbed by all these happy animals, happy with each other, happy I’m here, like a little kid’s movie.

Eden.

Yeah, I miss Eden, the thought of it. Bittersweet, poignant. What could have been.

What shall be. Remember, part of your calling is to live with one foot in Eden, so to speak, in your world. Look for evidence in the same way you look for gratitudes. You are already very aware of your planetary disconnects, just as you once were hyper aware of your grief. Begin to be alert for evidence of the way I Am restoring Eden through your life and experience. As you see that more and more in your waking life, your sleeping life will be more refreshing and your dream-life will mirror and augment your waking experiences. They will feed each other. Just keep feeding on My Promises to you, and let them nourish your soul.

 

 

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Family Farming

Lord, what would You have me do?

What do you want to do?

I pause, open my eyes wider, lean back. What comes to mind is need-to-do. Laundry, vacuum, errands, bills. All of that can, and will, likely happen today. Then I look at my unread issue of Outdoor Photographer. I think about the third installment of the ice and snow blog. My pen runs out of ink as I feel out of time…coincidental? I think not.

 I have a supply of new pens in the coffee table drawer and I get one out. I am startled by its deep, dark, fresh-flowing black ink. I didn’t realize how faded the old pen had become.

You have a fresh 24 hours. But you are living your days like your ink pen, in a sort of grey haze. You aren’t allowing the richness and vibrancy to come through. You edit and mute and dim down your life, your inner life, all the time. It leaks out, here on the Page, and in occasional conversations with those you trust. It shows in your smiles and kindnesses to strangers.

Ok, so, what would You have me do? I don’t want to be one of those pushy, unapproachable people, obnoxiously telling others what to do or how to be.

Do you think that’s what I mean by Shine?

I don’t see the 3rd way. There’s the quieter life, the life of kindness. And the quieter interior life, I’ll call it. There’s the loud life, the TV-preacher in-your-face life. And no, I don’t think You are calling me to that.

Imagine a farmer. He plants and reaps and feeds his family. Maybe his neighbors. Imagine a Mega-Farm, the whole operation like a machine, like a food factory. Now, can’t you imagine a 3rd way?

I guess the farmer could, if he had help, buy the farm next door. Feed double.

What if the farmer invented an entirely new way to sow, or reap, or irrigate? What if the farmer stumbled on a strain of grain that had a higher yield for the same acreage? What if the farmer shared his discoveries, his inventions, his insights, and in less than a generation, quietly and faithfully revolutionized “family farming?” The tractor completely changed farming after generations of plowing by hand.

Ok, yes, I see that. But what does that have to do with me, with my life? Gallery owner, sometime photographer, occasional writer—of work that for the most part lives here, on these pages, or in notebooks or folders in drawers.

If you could pass on one thing, if you could give every family member one gift, if you could give one thing to every friend, what would it be?

My mind races through ideas. I already know where I’ll end up. I don’t choose a winning lottery ticket or a paid-off house. I don’t even choose robust physical health, tempting as that choice is. I choose You. I choose a deep, personal connection to You. Because all those other things, anything I can think of, fades. But You…You are the One Who Shines, Lord. Who is steady and true and Always Is. I’d somehow give them You.

 So, how do I feed the world You?

One day at a time, one meal at a time. No matter how big the farm, or how great the yield, there is only today’s meal, in the Now, that can be provided and have an effect in real time. The rest is just theory, and commodities. What sustains is meeting the hunger, right now. You just keep doing what you are doing, and let Me multiply your reach—like the loaves and fishes.

Multiply reach?

Ah, you see. You’re smiling now. Good. Now scoot along. You need to eat your own breakfast and live your own fresh day. And look for some glad surprises. It is My delight to delight you. You don’t have to be so serious. Enjoy your life. Enjoy the adventure of it. I don’t give stale bread, dry bread, moldy bread, or crumbs. I give fresh, hearty, tasty, nourishing bread—one bite, one day of your life, at a time.

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Knowing

Lord, here is a concern. I don’t want to be deceived, and I sure don’t want to deceive others. So I write that and I think, the blurt is, what if I am just talking to myself, deceiving myself this is You, or worse? I think about the deception in Genesis, an egocentric focus, the whole first lie, you will be like God…

You are already like God—all humans are, in the sense that I made humanity to be spiritually sourced in Me. You are all meant to be “like God” – to walk in love and in peace with one another. That is not the stumbling block phrase. “Knowing good and evil” – that is the stumbling block phrase.

Remember “knowing” wasn’t used just for intellectual understanding but for intimate experience. I, the Lord, recognize evil but I don’t “know” evil. I do not experience evil in Myself, in My choices. The instant result in the Garden was shame (not-like God), blame (not-like God) and hiding from God and each other (not-like God). That is not wisdom. That was the lie, that experiencing evil would make humanity wise, make humanity more divine. But no.

I have spent all of human history in every culture trying to undo that lie, trying to restore individuals to Who I Am, to who each one can be in Me. Your lyric is right—you can’t hold My Fullness, but you can do your part. And your part is to shine and to inspire others to find their connection to Me.

 

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Name Me

So, I had a Christmas word for yesterday, what about today? What would You say about today?

Think about all the ways I Named Myself, all the ways I Am Named, in your scriptures:

Word

Light

Bread

Good Shepherd

Living Water

Truth

Way

Life

God-With-Us

Prince of Peace

Wonderful Counselor

You think of them as titles. What if you thought of them like nicknames, like affectionate nicknames: You say, honey, dear, sweetie. You call your kitty by her name but you also call her Sugar, same as you did with Freddi, your fox. You called Mikey, Mijou, as an affectionate nickname. Nicknames imply a close, special relationship. Even if someone becomes known only by a nickname, the origins of the name were always in relationship with someone special. So think again about all My Nicknames. Take the first one the Gospel of John uses. Word.

Think how you would use Word as a nickname in your relationship, your very personal relationship with Me. Ah, the writer of you is smiling now. Or Light. Can you picture this conversation—

Me, God: Hey, it’s Me, Word. Grab your coat and come outside, I have something I want to talk to you about.

You, Eve: Ok, Word, Ok, Light, I’m coming. Are You going to enlighten me?

Me, God: Yes, I as Truth Am going to Speak as Word, and Shine as Light on Myself as your Way, to give you wisdom in your decisions, direction for your day, which will bring Peace to your minutes and hours, and to your relationships with others.

Call on My Names—I have many more than these.

For everything you need, listen for My Name.

Wow, God, that’s…I don’t know what to say about that.

Anytime you don’t know what to say, look to Me to be Word.

Ok, so when I need…

When you need anything. For everything you need, I Am.

You miss your earthly father especially today. And I Am Abba, Father, Daddy. You miss your Mom, and I Am Bread who nourishes you and your truest cheerleader, saying, Well Done, and encouraging you along the way. You are never alone, not one of you. I Am—always, everywhere and for all time.

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Talking with Santa, talking with God

Lord, it’s almost Christmas. I remember our priest friend Fr. Bill used to always tell us, Jesus is coming! Jesus is coming! Everyone talks about Santa and we need to remember, Jesus is coming!

Talking with Me is not like waiting in line for Santa Claus, a little nervous and very excited, and wishing the other kids would hurry up so it can finally be your turn—and then you say your piece, but have to climb back off Santa’s lap and walk away and wait a whole year before you get another chance to be heard.

Being Timeless means I hear you yesterday, today, and tomorrow, and I hear everyone else in the same way. I KNOW you. All of you. And your thoughts, all human thought is not noise to Me, although some individual notes are discordant in the overall tune of the piece. Think of a conductor and an orchestra. A great conductor can hear each individual instrument, each voice. A great conductor knows when an instrument is out of tune, or off the tempo. Am I not greater than the greatest earthly Maestro?

Let Me retune your individual part of the chorus, of the symphony. Let Me give you back your song. Let Me simplify the score, and at the same time, increase your confidence and skill so you can play an ever-increasing complex melody of Love that is in harmony with those around you.

What if THEY are out of tune, you ask. Listen to Me. Don’t tune yourself to others’ instruments. Tune to Me, to My Voice. Every solution for every life’s question can be clearly heard when you are in tune.

 

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Whale Breath

In looking back at old journals, I found one entry that had a goal of writing in my journal once a week! These pages have shaped me, changed me. They are like whale breath, voluntary but essential. I have thought for a while that the writing of them helps me to listen—and to remember, or if I don’t remember, as a way to be reminded. I remember once years ago I gathered up everything I thought You had spoken to me through others and wrote it all out, but the emotional result was depression, not joy. It puzzled me then, I never understood that. And I have been reluctant to do that kind of exercise since. So the fruit of that effort was not nourishing. Can You help me understand why?

Those were all words other people said to you in My Name, interspersed with what you had sensed on your own. This was a time when “hearing from God” was hard for you and you relied mostly on others, and frankly what you received wasn’t enough. Some of those entries were a sentence or two. You were starving by then, and you had to wade through a lot of mud, a lot of “hard times” entries to get to even those morsels of Me. It wasn’t My true words to you that depressed you. It was the clinging residual of those times that depressed you.

Think about your prayer vision experience, in February 1992. That brought incredible joy. That brought abundance of assurance. That experience changed your life with Me. That was the turning point, the watershed experience. That was a foretaste of how you live now, and its legacy is all good.

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High-voltage Connection

My mind is in day-go mode. I need to center back down, right? What is most important today?

 

What is most important today is that you keep your peace. That you remember I AM with you. That you really remember what that means. That you choose. If you are going to walk down memory lane, walk those paths where My Promises came true in spades. If you are going to think about the future, remember I AM already present there, loving you, blessing you. Remember that your serenity is not dependent on circumstances, or on what anyone else says, does or experiences. Your serenity, the reality of your life, depends on Me.

Think of it this way: is your lamp that you are reading and writing by just now in any way dependent on whether somebody in the next town paid their electric bill? You each have your own connection. Yours happens to be a high-volt transmission line. Nobody else’s frayed wiring needs to affect you in the least.

Ha, that is funny, God. Somehow I am finding that funny. Ok, thank You.

 You’re welcome (with the hint of a chuckle).

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I Do

Here I am, Lord; it is I, Lord. Over and over, the same questions, the same questions…

You don’t expect Pete to ask you to marry him every day or every few days. You settled that with one yes and your later I do. You do expect to hear and say, I love you. Don’t confuse the two in your relationship with Me. Settle in your heart the promises I have made you—to bless you, to prosper your business, to give your body health and strength, to bless you and Pete, to bring you encounters in the wild, to open doors to share about Me and about your life in Me with a greater audience. All of that is like the “I do.”

I want you to think again of seven, of seven days, of seven years, as Sabbath and Jubilee years. These are years that celebrate such overwhelming abundance, you actually reap, eat and enjoy the fruit of past labors and coast on the breeze of My favor. Let Me lavish you, that is what Sabbath means. You think it means a fast—it means a feast. The ultimate Sabbath will be the Feast of the Bridegroom and oh! What rejoicing and revelry then! I want you to shed once and for all time your poverty model. I want you to go forth, rejoicing. You need to let your heart love what it loves.

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The Mirror of God’s Love

Lord, I am reading something You said just last week. You said when I show up, You show up. That wondrous things can happen when I show up—which I take to mean, when I am present. When I am willing. That in those times, You are present, and that is what makes the difference.

First of all, I Am always present, though often unseen, unheard and unfelt. People all over the planet breathe in air, multiple times a minute, and most don’t give it any thought. You think about your breath when you are short of it, when the air is thick with smoke or foul, or your lungs are not clear, and it is hard to take a breath. You think about your breath in certain forms of fitness or meditation, when you concentrate on your breathing as a spiritual or physical practice. Mothers-to-be practice breathing as part of childbirth. But then the practice is over, the baby is born, the air clears or the lungs fill again and once more, the breath fades into the background of conscious thought. People pray or reach out to Me in times of great trouble, when they cannot get their breath physically or financially or in their health or their relationships; people sometimes pray out of gratitude for blessings received; but then the moments pass, the crisis resolves, the hourly service concludes, and I fade into the background as busy lives move front and center.

So how can I live, how can we all live, more conscious of Your presence? What kind of relationship are You asking us to have, or inviting us into?

Think how many times every day you think of Pete, how often he crosses your mind. You factor his opinion into almost all of your decisions. You certainly talk with him about major changes to your day or to your life. You can’t wait to share good news with him, and when you are worried or anxious, you look to him for reassurance. Sometimes you forget how much he loves you, and you imagine that something you have said or done displeases him—and you react in that same way with Me, don’t you?

But I need you to realize that nothing you do or think or say creates a rift between us that My Love cannot bridge. Couples grow apart when they begin hiding their true selves from one another, when what they keep hidden inside is much more than what they reveal. You don’t have to fear revealing yourself to Me. Lean into Me as a plant grows toward the sunshine. Let My Spirit oil any worn, weary or rusty parts of your soul, your character. When you are most tempted to draw back, from fear or weariness or impatience or frustration or downright anger, come closer. Let My Love be the Mirror you look deeply into. Remember Who I Am and Who I Am in you. That is how ordinary days and ordinary circumstances and ordinary people become extraordinary. Remember Who I Am and Whose you are. Remember our connection. Don’t hide your fears or your flaws or what you think of as your failings. I see all, regardless. But if you can be willing to bring them all to Me, I can heal and restore and fix. There is nothing broken—not a body, not a spirit, not a heart, not a relationship, not a family, not a community, not a country—that My Love cannot heal. You can be one of those agents of healing—if you keep coming to Me to be made whole yourself.