Category: Calling

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Please and Thank You

Lord, I want my photographs to do so much. I want them to give voice to the land. The land itself. And its birds and critters. I want people to connect to the land, when they see the images.

And I want them to give a visual voice to Your own heart. I want that, too. I want them to be “inspirational” — that is, inspired. Literally, God-breathed. Your breath in them. I want people’s spirits and emotions touched. I want that connection, too.

I want to experience that, as a both/and. I want that when I go outdoors, when I get to photograph–and again, when the images and their stories get shared; and I also want them to stand and shine all on their own, without me present. All of that. I want all of that.

I have lived that already but I want that to continue and if I may be so bold, I want that to increase. It sounds almost selfish or greedy until I remember and realize what it is I am actually asking. It’s like a person asking for food or water. Just because we ate yesterday or last week or last year, we need to eat again. We need to be hydrated, again. And if our bodies need that, over and over, how much more do our spirits and souls need that? And I am asking for extra, extra portions to share. I am asking for more than “enough.” I am asking for an overflow that feeds and nourishes others. 

Years and years ago, You hearkened back to Nehemiah, and You told me to ask. You told me to write it all out, like a letter, lay it before You, ask You to read it. So I am asking. Again. And thanking You for blessings bestowed already. Again. And standing with my hands out and up, again, to be filled to that overflowing point where my work touches others. I know in my heart that when others encounter You, directly or indirectly, overtly or subtly, that is the point of intersection where everything good happens–healing, comfort, strength, joy, life, love, peace. So I’m asking.

And what have I said? What have I promised? While you are yet asking, I hear. While you are yet daring to form your heart into words, I Am already sending your Yes.

What you are asking, what you are saying “please” for is the very purpose you are born to live. Everyone is born into the world bearing gifts. Everyone. No exceptions. Every child born is My Child. Every human living bears My likeness deep within. Everyone. What you are asking is that I would bless your bringing forth that which I planted in you from the beginning. How could I do otherwise than to bless and increase it?

Here is another facet to your gift, to the calling that is yours. Calling is a deliberate word for not only are you called in the sense you first learned the term, in church; that is, called to be in service to Me–your intuition that all are called is correct. There is not one child, not one adult, I have not called to Myself, and not called to become the best version of themselves. No, not one. You are also called to Call. I have told you this before: call the wild to you. Call the birds, call the creatures, call the light, call the land, call the sky. Call out and watch creation respond, to your heart and your great, glad love. But there is a third meaning. You are also called to Call to others through your work. Think of your work as a kind of echo. As it bounces off the hearts and souls and spirits of those who view it, something deep inside of them will answer. Something deep within will respond. It may be that they are already fully awake and will quickly hear the timbre of their own heart’s call, of My call to them, in the particular ways they are each meant to live out their gifts in the world. It may be they are lightly dozing and this inner echo will wake them to new possibilities and encouragement. And it may be that they are slumbering deeply, unaware of their own rich gifts. For these, their encounter with you or your work may be the very wake-up call they need to rise and take up their destiny, newly empowered and strengthened. It may be some receive confirmation of stirrings long felt but not fully understood. It may others receive comfort or healing and that opens the door to once again living a fuller, richer, deeper life.

Your calling is to hear, yes. To see, yes. To share, yes. And in all of that, your calling is to Call.

God, I don’t know what to say. You continue to speak so deeply into my heart and take my speech and my breath away. I am thinking like a coach might think, I guess. Or a conductor. 

You don’t have to worry about finding the proper role or position or instrument for these others. That is My Work within them. You just point the way, and I will take over–sometimes directly, sometimes through still others–from there.

Yes, Lord. And Lord? Thank You. I think I could spend the rest of my life just saying Please and Thank You, and it would sum up everything. Oh, and I love You. Always, ever, that. 

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Promises, Promises

Promises, promises. Lord, that is what we say when we mean the opposite. The sarcastic voice reveals promises not kept. So about four days ago–I had to go back and reread the whole thing–You said You were signing a Permission Slip for me to begin to form a relationship with another wild fox family. So I have to start by saying both Thank You and I’m sorry. Sorry because deep inside I doubted. I doubted I was really hearing You. I doubted, not that You could, but that You would, and for me. I guess this is a human struggle. It is my struggle sometimes, and more than sometimes, lately. Anyway, that was on April 16, thatYou said that. The very next day someone sent me a message about a fox den. And I finally got the chance to go check it out. I was almost holding my breath, driving. And there they were. Baby foxes, doing what baby foxes do. I felt something deep inside just shift, like a sliding door moving aside, sliding open, setting me free, letting the air in, letting me out. I checked again at dusk. Still there! So again. I am sorry and Thank You. What a gift. I am actually–despite all these words–almost speechless. You said Permission. And here they are. Within days. 

What were field trips for?

Enrichment I would say. At least in my school years. We went to art galleries, we went to historic sites, we went to museums. The idea was to augment the classroom book learning with experiencing at some level what it was we were studying.

What else? What else did you just remember?

I had this flashback to middle school and the Science Club. The field trips to the lake bed, to the fossil deposit, to astronomy night, where for the first time I looked through a powerful telescope at the stars. That was amazing.

And where are you going?

In half an hour I meet up with other local photographers and we are going out, in the middle of the night, to photograph the Milky Way! Star shine! 

You see? Permission! A permission slip from your packet. You have permission to go outside, in the middle of the night, and photograph the starry sky.

Thank You, Lord. And God, I am sorry if I doubted You.

You didn’t doubt Me–you doubted yourself, your hearing. Because your longing was so great, you found it easy to imagine perhaps this was all your imagination. One of the reasons we started with foxes is precisely because your longing is so great. I long to meet you at your point of longing. And I long to show you just how connected we are, so you trust that connection more and more. This is one more example, one more experience, one more “faith comes by hearing” you can live out in experience.

Thank You again, God. So much joy. And tonight, when I went, I had a timeframe. I needed them to come out by a certain time. I couldn’t stay all evening. And one minute, literally, one minute before time was up, out they came! Thank You.

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Peace Shield

Lord, I’ve had seasons, years I mean, where music was front and center. And it flowed, it poured forth, in lyric and melody, songs, lots and lots of songs. And I have had much briefer seasons, often when I was out of work sick, when poetry came. Poem after poem, and the joy in that, in the midst of not feeling well, this explosion of poetic creativity, only to go silent again once I got well and the pace of daily life resumed. I’ve had seasons of writing prose, creative nonfiction, essays, stories for children, all kinds of prose, and again, some door shuts and all is quiet. Now I have enjoyed twelve years, it will be twelve this summer, of a visual photographic life, and I believe it has lasted so long precisely because it is part of my livelihood now, so I have reasons to keep going, and permission. Permission from myself, from those closest to me, from Pete. Permission to spend the time to hone the craft part, and to spend the time for the “right place, right time” part. I haven’t had the chance to allot that sort of time to writing for a long time. Ditto music. Something had to give, for photography to take its place. So I guess I want to know if it is possible for me to have both, to do both, to write and photograph, to write music (more than I do now, driving to work, in snatches) and photography. I don’t want to lose photography, lose my visual sensitivity. How can I have both? Won’t I have to give up one or the other?

That question is like asking Me if you will lost My Voice, the tangible sense of My Presence, because you love a person on earth, or even an animal. There is room in you for both. You’ve thought not, and been taught not, but you don’t have to choose between loving Me and loving them. You don’t have to choose loving Me only vicariously through loving them. Yes, I have called you–all of you–to love each other, but I also called you first to love Me. So it is with what you call your writer-self, your musician-self, your artist-self, your photographer-self, and yes, your business-owner-self. You have needed integration in order to live the expansion I planned for you.

You have thought your spiritual and your creative sides were like cousins, and that both were related only distantly to what you call your business-self. But you are not schizophrenic. You are not separate identities or even separate roles. You are yourself–complex, multifaceted, and finally shining in all directions.

We talked recently about the Four Directions, about you walking counter-clockwise on the Wheel. Let’s think of the Four Directions in another way.

Your East is your visual self. All you see and how you respond to all you see, the light.

Your West is your audial self, all you hear within. Music and story flow from your West, a deeply creative space in you.

Your South is your loving self, all your relationships lived out–including those with animals both domestic and wild.

Your North is your thinking self, your academic side, your mathematical and yes your organized self, how you organize or prioritize data. Your business sense comes from here.

I Am in you in all of these directions. I Am both Center and the very form that unites them. They are a Cross. They are also at their fullest expression a Circle. They are a Peace Shield. No more tugging or fighting within you. That pulls the wheel off balance, out of round.

You shall both see–and express–and hear–and express.

Feel and touch–and express. Think and synthesize–and express. It is bigger than you though.

It is not that I Am giving you a Shield.

It is that you, yourself, your life expressed, you ARE a Peace Shield. Have I not told you this before?

Uhh, I am not sure. I think so. I don’t remember.

Remember. Remember everything you need to remember. The Red Fox has come, from what you call east, wearing gunfire, to free the west, the gray/black fox, the hearer of you. For all you have heard from Me here, as story and song and writing, you will hear even more. And this twinning, sight with sound will be fully joined with Heart and Mind, and all united and spinning, like your world spins, and in spinning circles, like your earth circles, sustained by Me and held in balance and beauty by Me as well. Blue is for sky and for water. Blue overarches the keen, sharp peaks of your ind and undergirds the soft gentle growing and sharing, the touching and being touched, the giving and receiving green of your south. These are your colors.

You know now that black is really not black per se, it has all the other colors, sometimes with coppers and golds, as a kitty’s fur. Sometimes it has shimmering purples and iridescent greens like Blackbird’s feathers. The deepest ocean creatures still carry light within themselves as bioluminescence. So you carry My light deep within you.

This is your True Purpose, this integration, these multiple expressions. This way of hearing and seeing, and what you hear and what you see, all True. I have spoken over you as you slept. Now you are awake. Now it is time to arise. Don’t be anxious any more over anyone else’s anxiety, don’t be burdened for their concerns. If fighting stallions were to charge over the dunes, Fox would hear and see and feel them coming. She would know to either go deep within her den of safety–which is another way to say, come here to Me–or she would move to another spot, another vantage point, and wait there–which is another way to say, live Peace out in your world. Carry the Calm I have gifted you with.

You have gifted me with Calm? But…but…but what about my pinball brain?

You know now to remember the Shield. Yes, you spin, beautifully so. You take many strands and spin and weave a whole. That work flows best from an inner calm of assurance.

Lord, I am picturing a shield, with arrows going north/south and east/west. They look like a compass.

Yes, you live True North–and also True South and True East and True West.

Yours is a Shield of Peace, a Shield of Purpose, a Shield of Love and a Shield of Light. Sleep easy. You are, as you say sometimes, both guided and guarded. You can rest.

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Permission

I was just wishing I had more of my photos keyworded. Gosh, it would make things so much easier when I am trying to find an old image I never processed. And that prompts me to spin off into a whole series of to-do’s I never did, or finished. Sheesh. I had a productive day, though. The house looks better, finally. Kinda sorta. At least it looks better to me. I had paperwork to do and that is actually 90% finished. Last night I watched half of an hour-long podcast on creativity. I say watched–actually I half watched while I was sorting through papers on my desk, and even then, I managed only 30 minutes before I had to stop and give my full attention elsewhere. One of the questions the speaker was addressing was what stops you from creating? Several of the online participants said time, in one fashion or another. Yeah, me too. Or the sense that creativity is the reward after chores are done, which of course they never completely are. We have talked about this before, I know.  But somebody said something that I heard in a different way, somehow, and that was the phrase, Permission Slips. Give Yourself Permission. I remember permission slips–they let you go on field trips. I feel as if we have one coming at the end of the month. A Permission Slip. A Field Trip. I like the word slip, too — because I am thinking now not of a slip as in slip and fall, and not of the slip you wear under a skirt, but slipping out, slipping away, slipping through. A playful word, slip. Permission Slips. You didn’t fill them out yourself. I mean, you were not supposed to! It was for your parents to do. Your authority figures. The person in charge of you. I get the whole “give yourself permission” as an idea. Just not so much as a reality, ha! So if I came to You and asked You for a Permission Slip, what would You say? What would it say?

The Parent signs the slip. It is already filled out for whatever the permission is being sought to do. So let Me ask you–what would it say? What would you be asking My Permission for?

Oh! Oh. Well, dag, that stopped me in my tracks. Cliche intended. 

Why the cliche?

Because I miss animals. I miss wildlife. I miss being with them for more than a second, or five minutes. I miss being a part of their lives, I guess. I miss foxes. You know I miss foxes. I am going to spend the rest of my life, missing foxes.

Until you don’t.

Until I get over it, you mean.

Oh, no, I don’t mean that at all. You are not meant to “get over it.” Why would I want you to get over such a deep love?

Because it’s over. Because it’s gone.

Do you believe you still have the capacity to love another wild fox? Another wild critter?

Yes, Lord, I do.

Then your love life with the wild is not over. And while you may not see the fox you came to know so well, that does not mean your days of companionship with wildlife are over.

Really? Because I would so love that. Yes, I am eager for moments of connection–but honestly, I have been asking for moments only because–

Only because you think that is all you can hope for now. Moments. Brief glimpses, chance encounters.

Well, yes.

What if I told you your past life with your fox family was a prelude? What if I told you that experience was meant to prepare you for something even greater? Even deeper?

Are You telling me that? Because honestly, I don’t want to get my hopes up just to be disappointed. That would break my heart all over again. It is easier to be walled in, a little stoic.

But that is not honest. That is not who you are. You are so far from walled in and stoic.

God, being vulnerable, even to Your earth, it hurts, sometimes. 

And it is wildly joyous, too.

Yes, wildly joyous. That is why I miss it, I guess. 

What is happening with your little feral kitty?

Oh my goodness, she is hardly feral anymore! She lets me pick her up, she purrs loudly like a kitten, she nuzzles against me, she nuzzles against our Sheltie, it is amazing, the change in her.

Your love did that. Your trust did that. I have told you before, call the wild. Call them to come to you.

God, I called Freddi. I did. I called and walked and drove and called and wrote her a song and called some more. And she never came. I didn’t even see Patches!! I would love to meet Patches. If I can’t have Freddi, can I have Patches? I say that and then my shoulders slump. I’ve left Nags Head, left their territory. They didn’t leave me, I had to leave them. So what can I say about that? What can you say about that? What can anyone say about that?

Don’t fret, and don’t cry. Let Me restore the lost years. I happen to be very good at restoration.

Ha, yes Lord, yes You are. 

So let’s see that Permission Slip one more time.

Okay. Here goes. It says, I give Eve Turek permission to spend time outdoors creating another relationship with a wild fox family.

And you would like Me to sign that?

I would. So much. I know You could…You can do anything. 

I Am going to sign this slip for you. But before you go, I have something else for you. It is a whole booklet, a packet, of Permission Slips. Each one is pre-signed, by Me. Each one has your name at the top–

I Give My Child Eve Permission To…

and each one has a blank space for YOU to fill in.

Pre-signed?!? How can You do that?

Because I know you, I watch you, I trust you. You aren’t going to be selfish or foolish or hurtful with these slips. If anything you will try to overwrite your name with someone else’s, and give your blessings away. But these are written with indelible ink. These are for you.

God, the longer I hold on to these slips, the thicker the packet becomes. It is literally growing thicker in my hand by the second, as I am thinking about what these might look like. 

Yes, these are for your lifetime. You need a lot of slips, yet! There are a lot of field trips to come, a lot of adventures to have, a lot of books to read–and write–still in store. You are always asking for permission, even if you don’t ask aloud. So I want you to settle this in your heart, and this is a way you can do that. My Answer to you is Yes. The Answer is Yes; what is the question? Because I know who you are, and how you ask. So go live some Yes! Take My Permission and run with it! See where this leads you. The world awaits, and a beautiful, wondrous, alive world it is.

Wow, God, Permission Slips!! Thank You! 

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Bedrock

One of the AlAnon questions I need to remember is, do you fail to recognize your accomplishments? I used to make myself a celebratory cup of special tea; now I reach for coffee’s caffeine as fuel to do more, not to stop and relish what I just did. I think about it, then turn aside as if I haven’t really earned it. Says who, and by what criteria? When I say yes, but…I am engaging in dialog with the wrong conversational partner. And I never need to say yes in any context to that voice.

You are tired, yes, but actually very healthy.

Huh?

You keep choosing gratitude. You stubbornly dig to bedrock. And every time, every time, you find there your true self and My great Love. That is the conglomerate of your bedrock, your solid foundation. Not just My great love–for you know that is at the center of every heart, if only everyone would go within to find it. You know that now. But what makes this your bedrock, the key secret ingredient, is you. You, united with My great Love.

Not just My Love for you. Some stop there. Not just My Love for those like you. Some stop there. My great Love for all. That is part of the fusing. Think metaphors for fusing. Think glass–art glass. We are fused. You are changed, transformed–and so is My great Love transformed–transformed, again, into a body I can use, into a soul, into an expression, an outlet in the world. This transfigures you and in turn, your yes transfigures My Love into your day, into your time, into and through your life. Think about fusing. There is more depth, more truth here than you know yet.

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Mind Mapping

Lord, even after all these years, when I pause, I have this thought of, “He’s not coming. He won’t speak.” Like a blank page, blank canvas thought. But I pause anyway. I am remembering reading the Mind Map book, years ago. How I loved it, how it puzzled me, how it gave me a new framework to think about thinking itself. Lord, what would Your Mind Map look like?

Instant explosion of color–dancing–delight–joy–hope. Everything positive, beautiful.

One of My Mind Map branches is you.

I never thought of that, but I know instinctively, it’s true. What does my branch look like?

That is what you are going on Vision Quest to find out.

Oh!

Your Vision Quest is not about deprivation. It’s about expansion. It is about focus, but the paradox is this–as we macro-focus, close-focus on you, on My Mind for you, your vision of yourself and for yourself will expand like looking through a wide-angle lens. My Vision, My Map, truly is infinite. I want to share more of My Map with you. That is what your Vision Quest is for. It’s not that I Am going to tell you everything that will happen. It is not about “what.” It is not about “when.” It is about “who.” Maybe some “why.” That may point the way toward some “what” but that is not what this is for. This is not a journey to discern decisions. It is to discover the self I see, not what the world sees. Not what you see. Even though your own vision has expanded, it is still just a glimpse. You are still just squinting through dark polarized lenses. This Light won’t blind you. It will free you. This is bigger, for you and in you, than Renewal was. That was all I had to work with at the time, and you opened to that. This is much, much more. More than these pages have been.

Don’t worry or concern yourself now about larger effects, larger purpose. Of course it will bless others as you live out the Quest, as you embody the Vision. That is your heart and part of My heart for you. But it begins with you, and that is where we begin as well. It is not selfish, it is life. It is not sin, it is love–My Love for you. It will change everything–it will seem like a Big Surprise, surprise after surprise, image after image.  You can’t “do” it wrong, this Quest, for I Am leading you. The only “wrong” would be to not come. But here you are, so that is settled. For today, take these thoughts with you. Dancing Delight. And “greater than Renewal.” Feel the excitement, the quickening, the eager anticipation. Hold that feeling, that intention. That is like your walking stick. Take that with you everywhere, like your rock. That is how you begin.

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The Long Run

Lord, an old friend asked me today, how long have I been doing this, meaning, photographing. And really, the answer dates back to high school. But there is a subset of answer, too. How long have I been photographing in line with my own voice, and that is a much shorter time. I remember in the beginning of my era with switching to digital, wondering how others managed to make the images they did. And in that day, I probably would have even said “capture the images” but I don’t say that any more. I try not to even say “take.” I would rather say “make” or “receive.” I was looking back at a journal from that timeframe, and I am astounded at what You said way back then, so I want to write it down again here. As a reminder–so that when I get discouraged, which I do on occasion, I will have this to come back to. So here is what You said–

You’re not on a day hike. You are not capturing the surface, the obvious, taking glimpses and glances. This is like a marathon journey, like hiking the A.T., like moving into a landscape to discover its nuances, its depth, its rhythms and seasons. Go with what draws you. It is okay to notice where others pause, stop, camp. Some of the same spots may draw you, too. But there will be many other spots where you are drawn to linger and they rush on, unseeing. Find your own touchstones. Photograph, draw, paint and write what speaks to you at the time. You have no idea how much joy some of those pictures, that you saw first in your heart, will bring others. That is why you were there. That was the touchstone.

So here it is, more than 10 years later. 

And here you are. What have you learned?

Well, one thing I am learning, is how consistent Your Voice is. I look back, I look within, You seem to be saying the same things. Another thing is, how I seem to need that reassurance, which I guess is why You keep saying the same things! 

This is part of what it means to run a marathon. You need stamina. You need water. You need to know that I Am in this with you for the long haul. Why do runners run?

Well, I know one thing. Not many run to win. Seriously. I know some marathoners, incredible people. They run to run. They run to finish. They run because they can.

So why do you photograph?

Because I love it. I love the way I feel, outside. I love everything about it. I sense You there. And I love to share the stories, later. I do. 

Your stories, as you call them, have such an impact because they are slices of real life, your life. So I would reassure you, you have many miles to go before you sleep. So sleep well, little one. You are doing well.

 

 

 

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Password Protected

Lord, thank You for my computer being repaired. That was scary, thinking I had lost documents when I thought I had them backed up elsewhere. What I did lose was all my passwords; my new hard drive has no clue who I am or where I’ve been! So I am thinking about passwords, about keywords, about Your keywords in my life. What I keep returning to–gratitude, peace, love, joy, abundance. These are overall keywords, though, right? I mean, they apply to everyone. 

What do passwords do?

Well…they grant access. They are like doors, with keys. If you have the key, you can get in, into the program, into the website, and once you get in, you can do things.

So My first keyword is Grace. Grace opens the door from My side at the slightest whisper, the least knock. You are wondering, why a door at all? Why not a pass-through with no doors at all? Do you know why?

No. I mean, I’ve been taught it’s because we weren’t holy, we aren’t clean, we need Your blood to get in, the sacrifice of your life in exchange for our life. 

Humans are for the most part very aware of justice. “That’s not fair” is an early cry of children. Fairness, rightness, fair play, justice–all are hardwired into the human psyche. So over time whole systems of justice that were based on retribution, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, were established. But what did I say when I was here on earth? I said, judge not. Why would I ask you to live to a higher standard than God the Father? The more difficult truth is, you humans needed a sacrifice in order to satisfy your own needs for your own ideas of justice. And since I Am Mercy and I Am Love, I came as Jesus to provide what you yourselves demanded of yourselves, the sacrifice you could not give but imagined I would require. Jesus’ death was essential in order for you to feel you could walk through the door of My Grace. For My part, I Who Am the Door Am also always eternally Open.

 So…Jesus had to die, not to satisfy You, but to satisfy…us? Our misinformed logic about what grace even is?

Exactly. See how much Love is revealed in that truth? “For it is not My will that anyone perish, but that all come to repentance”–that is, to a change of mind and heart and action. That all leave any thought of retribution behind. That all come to a life of abundant, limitless Love.

This is what protects you, all of you, from your greatest fear, that you are not enough, not good enough, not worthy enough, never doing or being enough. You–all of you–are created Beyond Enough. You are–all of you–created to shine and thrive. So come running and skipping, walking and leaping and praising God through the Door! And as you pass through, watch it dissolve behind you and breathe the fresh air in front of you. No more locks, no more keys, free and complete access to My Kingdom. That is what My Will looks like for every human life, every human heart. That is what I live and love for–and it is what I Am asking you to commit to, spreading that message in every way you can.

Ok, Lord, I don’t completely understand, but I do hear You. 

 

 

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Emergence

Lord, some people fast. How can I prepare, or train, for what You are calling me to do, to become?

I’m not exactly calling you to Become. I Am calling you to Come, Be. Be who you are. There is a difference.

What about transformation? That is becoming; that is change.

Not at emergence. At emergence, the Butterfly Is. But it must come forth. It must emerge. At emergence others see—and say—transformation! Well, yes—and no. The Butterfly always was, within the caterpillar.

You saw the butterfly! You called it forth! Things that are not as though they are!

Here is the Mystery. The “are not” is in your vision—the “are” is in Mine. What I call forth is really Vision, is for you to see what I already see, and Name.

Butterfly?

Butterfly.

Fragile…

Resilient. Strong. Beautiful. Inspiring and uplifting. Gentle. Living only on sweetness, kept alive by joy. “Born in calm.” And passing on a legacy of beauty and freedom for generations to come.

So the transformation?

Is already accomplished. You are who I say you are.

Then why the word about waiting?

You aren’t waiting to become—you are waiting to be revealed.

God, I have so many swirling thoughts and questions, questions about the business, and being this, this other thing, this butterfly-thing. I don’t want my life with critters to be a schtik. You know? I want it to be real, so real.

Eve, it is. It already is. It is your doubt that makes you falter. The critters, as you call them—and yes, call them—know you. They recognize you. You are one who has been coming. They have been waiting for you. You won’t chase them, you will draw them.

 

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Transformation

Lord, when I was writing about Love as a watchword for 2018, for the planet, the word transformative came to mind as well, for myself. I was thinking the changes I have already made, even starting this blog, were transformative. So is transformative a word for me, for 2018?

Transformation is a process. You are experiencing it personally and professionally on several levels, and 2018 will see the end of one era and the beginning of another. There are changes in store, changes that will free you to travel and be even more fully creative.

God, you say that and my heart lurches. Literally, my chest feels tight and my neck zings and my head is pressured and I feel like I can’t take a good deep breath.

I Am trying to re-birth your writer. What was the caterpillar transforms into the butterfly’s body, lifted by its new wings. Even more fully will word and imagery be united in you.

You’ve been very analytical. You’ve tried to reason your way. You’ve tried to calculate your next steps. You’ve tried to make sense out of circumstances. I gave you a very sharp mind but you are not using its full potential—and you are using it in the wrong way and for the wrong purpose.

I don’t understand?

I created your quick, sharp mind to be creative. You keep turning over stones of old ground. I created your mind to see forward and you keep looking over your shoulder. That creates the tension you feel in the left side of your neck, by the way.

Really?!

I want, right now, you to commit to East, to Vision, even more vision. This is the transformation I have in store for you. Walk, seeing. Light will become even more important, and your work will take on even more of an ethereal, other-world visionary quality. By My Spirit, you shall see and name things that are not, as though they are. The storyteller shall emerge in power within you. The poet and lyricist shall rise up. No longer shall you struggle to find the right words, for words themselves will come at your call, at your beckoning. As your planetary winter melts into spring, so shall you take this time to transform your house, your working space, your schedule—you are about to experience a life-shift, in which your ability to minister through your creative gifts will increase. Leave your analytical mind behind and come back to Vision. See, and then see. Hear, and then hear. Butterflies are East symbols. The Butterfly is your symbol for East now. It combines journeys, transformation, nectar-seeking and the golds and yellows of an eastern morning.

Whoa! Butterflies see color! So the concept of color…

Is a Vision concept.

My Voice will be louder, not softer; clearer, not vaguer. I don’t want you stumbling around in the dark trying to figure things out. That is a tremendous waste of time and energy. I want to illuminate your path. I want to give you wisdom.

But aren’t we supposed to work at it?

If by “it” you mean a relationship with Me, the work is to believe and receive. Say yes, and go, flow, know. Remember, My Light will refract through your life.