Restart

Lord, I have been absent from here. I have trouble re-booting once I have let something lapse. So I need Your help with this. Was this just for a season? Stopping feels like failing. Consistency is key, and I am not being consistent.

You are being consistent—just not online.

Lord, what do I say? What I have been saying in my head is, it was easier, actually, every day. I shared everything. Now, having to glean, and decide what, is somehow harder, and I freeze. I froze, I stopped, I wasn’t sure.

You began to doubt—doubt the work had purpose, doubt the work had impact. You began to question whether I was in the sharing of it at all.

Yes, I suppose so. What to keep, and what to give away.

You made it too hard, too complicated. What was your aim here in the beginning?

To share how we are with each other. How I sit with this notebook and listen to each thought I have and there You are. How I am led to photographs meant for me, meant for sharing.

Then what?

Well, to try to inspire others to find and grow their points of contact with You. To say it’s possible. To say it’s wonderful.

This was never meant to be a Dear Abby column.

Well, no!

But you tried to make it so. Instead of coming to the page as you have done for years, just to pour your heart out to Me, you began this subtle shift, of wanting to somehow bridge the gap others have, or feel they have, in their relationships with Me. You began to ask what you imagine—in your empathy, which is a strong gift in you—that they all might be thinking or feeling. Slowly and subtly you moved away from what you think and feel. Your motives were good and pure, but the shift derailed you. I didn’t call you to be a stand-in for anyone else, to come to Me like an emissary and return with a dispatch for another. I called you to Come. Come for yourself. Come and see. Come and hear. Come and walk. And then, I proposed that you share the fruit of all those mornings writing, all those moments seeing and photographing, to invite others along on your journey—Our journey. Not to try to craft journeys for your readers. That is another task entirely—but to allow them to peek and eavesdrop on Our journey. Yours, and Mine. If you can say yes once again to this, then Now Through A Glass has purpose and reach.

Just be me? With You?

Who else should you be? All I Am asking you to do is draw back the curtain on this life, this shared life.

Ok, God, then okay. Yes.